Gonna set my heart at ease…

photo6fullSometimes, the words in a song hit us because they reflect exactly how we are feeling at the moment...

This song really hit me in a very strong way:

Gonna take a sentimental journey
Gonna set my heart at ease
Gonna make a sentimental journey
To renew old memories

Perhaps not so much the last two lines of this famous song...but the punch is on the "set my heart at ease" part. What is the message here? It told me, directly, that each one of us has the power and the right to take control of how we feel...and that we can set our heart at ease.

How? you are going to ask...My first step, and it can very well not your first step, is to discover that doesn't matter what others do...but it is important to focus on what I choose to receive. I can't be open to other people's opinions, as if they were true reflections on me. Anybody can say anything, and that doesn't reflect me...I wish people near me would see me as a wonderful person, but if they prefer to see only negative aspects, that's their problem. I know who I am...and I'm not what they project on me. My heart is at ease here...only accepting what it considers true and valid and constructive.

The second step? I had to dig into my childhood memories, recover my dreams from that time, set them in the proper honor place...and watch their importance on who I am now. Do you want to hear this story? is short and sweet....

I was attending primary school in the old-fashioned way: walking ten blocks back and forth from home to school. I loved doing that, because it was free time, free from control and supervision either from home or school. I used to take my time and go around a block where a nice house attracted my attention. It had a balcony, with plenty of geraniums making a red splash on the white cement... I was enchanted by that house, and my heart was promising to my future self..."Some day we will live in a great house, no pain, no abuse, no fear, but lovely flowers in the balcony..." That picture is still engraved in my heart and it somehow set my heart at ease for a long time.

That was me at 8, at 10 years old...Now, looking back, I can see that the girl I was then and there kept her promise. In several opportunities, I was able to find and afford great places where to live, with flowers and plants and peace of heart. In those opportunities, it looks like the right house dropped from heaven exactly how I wanted it, and the miracle part is that those houses were impossible for my own means to afford.

My little lesson? you can set your own heart at ease, just listen only to your own center of light and let that light shine.


  1. Theresa, 26 January, 2016

    25 yrs of emotional abuse and I didnt know I was a victim. I never really knew him, this man of enormous “few” words to me, yet way too many words with friends and co-workers. Two yrs ago, while confiding in my sister about my relationship, feelings of worthlessness, it was then she said, “Theresa, he sounds passive aggressive and narcissistic behaviors. This man I was married too and lived with 25 yrs, divorced after 8yrs, lived in separate houses, yet still together doing an in and out relationship. After 7 yrs, we reunited, I moved into his house and 10 long depressing yrs to now, I finally moved out and sleeping on a mattress on the floor at my eldest sons house with his family. This is the house I bought after divorce and lived in for 5yrs and sold to my son one yr after reuniting, my $50,000.00 check was put in his acct to show sincerity and love for him on my part, crazy, Yes I know!! 2 yrs I’ve received and kept every email letter from NORA, but it only till now that I am finally beginning to read and really hear what she is saying. I am at the bottom. I need so much help. I don’t even know where to begin. Who am I ? And how do I find myself. Thank you NORA, ever so kindly, Theresa

    . .

  2. admin, 04 February, 2016

    Dear Theresa….your letter is really sad,and I wish we could be near,as to give you a hug and the love and attention you deserve. It is sad because you have been raised to be attentive to others, and so now,you find yourself alone, depleted and in need to find who you are….My first idea is: you are not lost to yourself…there is this Theresa who is alive and vibrant and positive inside you…we have to recover her. Please, get a notebook, and keep a diary with the title: “Path to my personal recovery”in large letters. Every day you have to write down the action you have taken to make yourself happy: a walk in the park? 5minutes alone with a cup of tea? a call with your best friend? begin recording the little things in life that make you feel better, at peace with yourself…Then, you can begin to be creative and ask: how can I make myself happy today? and register new ideas and suggestions for your own pleasure. Remember: the task now is to love yourself without guilt or remorse or any negative thinking…I’m giving you permission to love yourself unconditionally. You have been a nice and loving woman for all around you, but now, to recover, you need to love yourself. It is urgent, and it is necessary that you care only about yourself…later your mind will begin planning for a future with joy and peace, but first, you need to love yourself. Here is a video on tapping to reinforce self-love: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CGybX8_8mto
    Please, write back if you would like more support…sending you lots of love and admiration for your awakening!!

Copyright © Passive Aggressive Husband
%d bloggers like this: